In slightly slangy French, we would say “And my c… is it chicken?” » aka the “And my ass it is chicken?” » of our green years…
Message to tipsters of all stripes and even in the paddock, especially outside the Honda stand, who want to spoil the fun for us, please swallow the bell (shut up)… A little slang never spoils anything, it's a very poetic language but for the purists I switch to the usual Franglais of motor sports…
We have a crazy MotoGP championship, where we see a French rookie attack the absolute star that is Marc Márquez, we have a Rins who beats said Márquez on the Austin circuit where he was supposedly unbeatable, we have a Petrucci who can't believe he won on his " home circuit »… (Circuito a casa)…
So yes, we're not yet halfway through the championship, we'll be there after Brno, one driver has points ahead in the general standings, it's like that in all motor sports...
But only in motor sports, in other disciplines there are eighths, quarters and halfs, in GP it's final every time!
Okay, it's not just anyone who is the driver in the lead overall, five times titled in the category “first class » (I hate the expression “queen category” so often used by my colleagues…). Well, one day I will give you the definition of “colleague”, but here I remain on the Czech horizon…
And the fact that the guys who say and write that Márquez is already titled are force-feeding me harshly... Why? Because the GPs are a pleasure, an emotion, a thrill, noise and fury, and this throughout the season, witness the incredible number of spectators at the last GP each year in Valencia...
Besides, a GP is also a show, and at the show even when I know the ending and each shot and each line I get the thrill..." Rio Bravo » seen more than fifty times, the “Uncle gunslingers " double, " Sympathy for the Devil » listened to a thousand times, “ Good golly miss molly danced ten thousand times...
Every time it's goosebumps.
So when I don't know the ending, I hate the guy behind who tells what's going to happen...
A demonstration can be made by the figures, Marc Márquez has a fifty-eight point lead overall. There are ten GPs left, or 250 points to distribute to the potential winner(s), and you tell me that the title is already « in ze pocket "?
A demonstration can be made through the guts, Ducati, self-proclaimed challenger already says that Marquez is unbeatable, I played rugby in my youth, a guy who entered the grass with fear in his stomach (and saw the big violent people in front , there was something!) was left on the bench…
A demonstration can be made through the absurd... We will see Rins, Quarta, Viñales, if we tell them before riding astride that there is no point in killing themselves, that they are beaten in advance , are they bending the saplings or are they giving us a straight line?
A demonstration can be made by intimate conviction, in his famous “ J'accuse ”, Zola had written “ I swear to you that Dreyfus is innocent », I am also sure that if I tell Márquez, before a GP, that he is already titled, it will be me who will take the right…
A demonstration can be made by analogy. If you are so sure that he is already titled, I suggest you attack Brno on Márquez's handlebars, the starting line will be great if you don't stall, we pass the two, the three waoouuuu! Afterwards, take more than 65 degrees of angle, then finally we will watch it on TV…
The genius of motor sports (I've followed almost all of them and I'm still like a kid whenever I watch a formation lap) is that nothing is ever sure...
If you need certainty at the c... take polls in politics, go play a crazy martingale at the casino, scream “I hate blacks » in the middle of Harlem or do like the guy described by Steve McQueen in “ The Seven Mercenaries ", the hero of his joke runs naked in the desert and throws himself on the cacti just to find out what it feels like... Believing that we see the future, that's the enemy (everywhere, in fact, not just in motor sports) it is the doubt which is a wonderful permanent crush.
A demonstration can be made as a historian, ask Rossi (if you haven't taken enough slaps yet...) if in 2006 we can lose a title (how do we say it again? won in advance...?) during the last GP of the season?
So can’t wait for Sunday in Brno… let one of my colleagues say “ beurno "...
Yet easy to pronounce Brno…
But no, you don't care about Brno, you already know who will be titled, so what's the point of watching (paid) TV or reading the journalists who are like those from Paddock GP... more passionate than them you die?
Moreover (in boxing we call this last argument the “ knock out ") even if I knew in advance that Márquez would be champion, I would still watch the GPs, with my heart beating at 20 rpm, so party crashers, get out of there!
Jean Louis Bernardelli, alias “ Spitz » for short, has been a motorcycle and car journalist for decades, in other words he's a vioque. And it is known that vioques are always in a bad mood. Except on GP days! And this rare good mood is well worth a ticket... (A ten-ball note specifies the red-chef...)
Jean-Louis Bernadelli
